Herewith Care Stories: Two sisters and a quest for homelike care

Meet Estelle and Dolores: Two sisters on a journey to find care

Estelle has been looking after her sister since Dolores had a stroke in 2022. Since that time, they have tried everything from skilled nursing facilities to memory care units and assisted living, moving Dolores from Missouri to California to be closer to her family.

Over the years, Dolores’s needs have increased, and Estelle has searched for just the right combination of senior care services to meet her physical, emotional, and memory care needs, while also keeping her in a homey, comfortable environment.

Here’s the story of their journey to finding the perfect caregiver for their situation, combining affordable in-home senior care from Herewith with the services provided at their trusted assisted living community and local enrichment programs.

Finding an alternative to skilled nursing facilities

After her sister’s stroke back in 2022, Estelle travelled to visit her and found her in conditions she describes as “terrible”—a facility with no warmth, where residents were left alone and staff was insufficient to meet their needs.

From there, she quickly helped her sister move into a memory care unit, where despite her hope for improved memory care expertise, the new facility still felt cold and institutional. This wasn’t the environment she wanted for her sister.

Disillusioned, Estelle helped her sister relocate closer to family, and eventually settled on an assisted living facility, where she could keep a close eye on her care and help her access supplemental care services, like personal caregiving and companionship.

The solution? Flexible in-home care plus assisted living

Dolores was diagnosed with vascular dementia and progressive supranuclear palsy, which causes her to need physical assistance and memory care to support her cognitive needs and provide companionship.

When looking into the best in-home care options for dementia, Estelle realized that one-on-one support was essential, even though her sister’s assisted living facility wouldn’t be able to provide that.

She describes how many assisted living and memory care facilities are low on weekend staff. “Not a knock on them, but to be honest,” states Estelle, “I think the weekend staff are really tired because they're stretched thin. So Friday to Monday, we need a personal caregiver.”

When she consulted the director of her sister’s facility, she was referred to Herewith—an easy platform to find flexible, private senior care that she could tailor to her sister’s needs, while allowing her to stay in the welcoming, home-like environment of her assisted living community.

Finding the right personal care on Herewith

A friendly, no-nonsense woman with over 30 years of experience in HR, Estelle brings a down to earth perspective to hiring private care.

She was seeking a great fit personality-wise and a specific skill set. She needed someone trustworthy and honest, who would get along with her sister, with the physical strength to push her wheelchair for walks up the steep hills of San Francisco.

As she considered different caregivers, she identified the non-negotiables in her caregiver search.

“I tried one female caregiver who's younger than I am. And on a walk together she gave up and told me to push my sister’s wheelchair. And I said, I'm paying $25 for me to push my sister. So it hit me that I needed to find something different.”

She needed support on weekends and evenings, and help getting her sister to and from appointments and other activities during the week. She especially wanted to make sure her sister’s caregiver had experience caring for dementia or Alzheimer’s patients and lived nearby—avoiding delays and cancellations due to long commutes.

In a long list of Helpers, a surprise candidate rose to the top

Working closely with Herewith’s customer service team, she was able to review many Helper profiles and conduct interviews, but it wasn’t until one surprise Helper profile that she found the right fit.

As she reviewed applicants, she came across a familiar name—Manuel.

An unexpected connection leads to a trusting bond

“Manuel is a very good caregiver. I actually was familiar with him because he was the caregiver at my sister’s previous place, but I didn't know him very well at that time.”

And it turns out, Estelle found just what she was looking for with Manuel.

Estelle shares how the initial connection between her sister and Manuel has grown over time, leading to a trusting caregiver relationship and good communication:

“My sister has a temper, she's impatient, and she has dementia. It took a little while, but Manuel is very adjusted now—he can anticipate her needs. He's found a way to communicate with her. Dolores doesn't respond well when you try to tell her what to do, but if you make it seem like it's something she thought of, she'll do it. And Manuel has figured that out.”

Estelle’s advice? It’s all about care

Whether it’s the quality of caregiving your loved one receives or the customer service you receive during your caregiver search, care is at the heart of what’s most needed for older adults and their families.

“You know, I'm not the most techie person. I’ve been retired for six or seven years. So my tools are mostly my iPad. I don't use a laptop. So Herewith’s customer service rep was very patient, adjusting to what the customer’s needs are—which can be very sensitive.”

Follow-through was essential to helping Estelle feel at ease through the process. “Herewith checked in with me the first couple of weeks of Manuel, and I thought that was helpful. It's not just about money, it's not just about closing a deal.”

Estelle and Dolores have been through it all, from post-acute care to skilled nursing and assisted living. They’ve worked with doctors, nurses, and caregivers alike, and according to Estelle it doesn’t matter how much you pay, it always comes down to care.

Even the most high end facilities are only as good as the care your loved one receives.

“The main differentiator is really caregiving. So organizations like yours are important, and I'm just grateful that I found Herewith. And I'm lucky to have found Manuel.”

Looking for a trusted caregiver like Manuel? Explore customizable, private senior care services for your loved one today.